#3 Sunday

Today was not one of those days where I left church, grinning ear to ear, feeling fresh and renewed, ready to conquer the week ahead. I do experience those days on many occasions, but it was not today. Today was a #3 Sunday. That was until I talked to someone who completely changed my perspective.

If you are a parent, you might know what it means to "whisper-yell" at you kids in a public place, to glance at the person in front of or behind you, giving them a desperate look that says, "Please don't judge us." or "I'm sorry on behalf of my family." You also know why parents look at each other and roll their eyes. Perhaps you have experienced those moments when your child; holds a giant booger in the air in the middle of a Global Pandemic, makes an announcement about pee or poop to the whole congregation, or asks you out loud, "Mom, Did you fart?!!", hosts a straight up sibling war amidst the pews. Maybe you've gotten to church only to realize that you forgot the snack bag on the counter (because snacks are the secret to keeping them quiet). Maybe you have stormed out of that church like your butt was on fire with your screaming toddler only to come back in all graceful and ready for a fresh behavioral start (for you and the kid😂 ). Have you ever felt like nobody could possibly be paying attention to what's going on, because your family is literally that distracting, and seemingly disrespectful? By the way, if none of the above applies to you, mind your business.

You know after the "Our Father" and the priest says, "Peace Be With You" and then tells you to "offer peace" to the people around you. There have been plenty of times when I just look at my husband and laugh, as to say, "how do we offer these folks peace, like with us still here, being the opposite of peaceful?" I have actually said to people in the past, "Peace be with you, no thanks to us."

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3 kinds of Sundays

I have Sundays where:

#1 Sunday) (The best outcome possible!) .. The kids behave like angels (or close; Yes, it does happen!) This is when (my husband and I) hear all/most the readings, plus the homily, and feel uplifted and lighter! We have those adorable moments where one of the kids belt out in song, or loudly chant, "Amen!" Better yet, when they say something that blows our mind and lets us know that they were paying attention.👏 We get in the car and say things to each other like, "Look how blessed we are!" We all leave church in a good mood. Partly because we participated mostly/fully, and partly because we are having a "proud parent moment." A #1 Sunday is always the goal!

#2 Sunday) I am really consistent with giving the kids consequences and continue repeating myself until they comply(then church is over haha) I'm left asking myself, "What just happen because I missed all of that?" or maybe I hear bits and pieces and feel like I got something out of the experience. The kids aren't necessarily behaving badly (mostly just kids being kids, you know?) We get in the car and I think something along the lines of, "That could've gone worse, could've gone better.."

#3 Sunday) I am just physically and mentally exhausted, and I borderline ignore the children like I'm oblivious to what's happening around me. I just kind of allow my husband to take over. It's almost as if I check out for several minutes at a time. You know, I'm all like, "Whose kids are those and am I supposed to be making them listen?" All the sudden they are not my responsibility because, "Not Today, Kids, Mamma needs Jesus!" and I'm gonna pay attention if it kills me!

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When walking to the truck today, after church (after a #3 kind of Sunday), I spoke with a gentleman after my daughter and I walked in front of him. He was waiting to exit the parking lot, and rolled down his truck window. I joked with him saying, "If you heard us in church today, you may be considering running us over." We shared a good laugh. He then became very genuine and sincere and he assured me that my husband and I were doing a great job and encouraged me to keep doing what we are doing. When I told him, "we were quite the handful"(by handful I mean we were like a circus act), he said, "hearing your kids was the most joyous sound to me because there are so few kids in the church." He went on to say, "hearing your kids was the best part of mass for me."

Sometimes our worst moments(parenting or otherwise), are such a gift to someone else. (I recognize that in comparison to some peoples' problems, a #3 Sunday is a minor problem.) In our frustrating moments, we are doing good work. Sometimes the task we are doing feels like a complete waste of time. So many Sundays, I ask myself, "Why do we even bother?" because I'm so distracted I can't focus on what's in front of me. That stranger's comment today helped to adjust my perspective and I'm so grateful for it! He helped to me realize what's important is that we keep showing up, keep trying our best, and keep modeling for our babies(or the world around us) our priorities. This applies to more than just church. It applies to all the things we do in life even in the days we don't feel like it. Since I didn't hear all I could have in church today, I'm going to carry what that man said to me in the church parking lot, throughout my week. I'm so thankful for that man's kind words today.

We all have a purpose and its so important that we realize it. Let this stand as a reminder to never underestimate the value of a compliment. Your compliment might fall on someone who is feeling defeated (a #3 Sunday, like me), or worse. You might have the power to completely turn someone's day around. If you're feeling defeated, I hope you will allow yourself grace and remember the importance of what you're doing. If you're feeling defeated(or worse), allow your perspective to be flexible. "Things aren't always what they seem" could not be more true! My "#3 Sunday" was "the best part of mass" for a complete stranger. This leaves me feeling pretty good about the work that I'm doing. Forgive me if I need to be reminded again next Sunday. ✌

Share an embarrassing, funny memory that you endured in church or in public. (Click "share" link).